I've been hiding this kind of feeling for such a very long time. I don't know who I can talk to about this and I think the only way I can express it through my blog. I know I've been such a great hypocrite to myself trying to deny this kind of feeling. I've been avoiding it for almost 7 months from September last year, trying to let myself free, screaming, struggling hard to free my soul from the sadness and sorrow. The more that I try to forget, the more it grew stronger each day. I don't know where else I could hide myself from this feeling.
"The worst type of crying is the silent one. The one when everyone is asleep. The one when you feel it in your throat, and your eyes become blurry from tears. The one where you just want to scream. The one where you have to hold your breath and grab your stomach to keep quiet. The one where you can’t breath anymore. The one when you realize the person that meant the most to you, is GONE."
P/S : To my sister, Nur Amanina, if you're reading this, I'm sorry for being such a terrible sister to you since the day I was born. Adik rindu Mama, Ayah, Along and those fur kids.
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